Laced With Brilliant Smiles and Smiling Eyes...

First off, I'll say that I should probably be more regular with this thing...

Secondly

......I just wrote some thank you notes for Christmas gifts I received and it made me think about how much I love writing thank you notes. I truly appreciate every single gift that I get especially at this time because a lot of relatives have been weeded out of the gift section of my life since I am now almost 21. Sometimes, when I'm writing these thank yous, I wish that I could thank them in a better way. I truly am thankful, and I hope to show that in everything that I do.

Thirdly,

I am adding to the _____ of the weeks, and it is Moral of the Week

Moral of the Week: Always be thankful "Silent gratitude isn't much to anyone." G.B. Stern

Song of the Week: The Places You Have Come to Fear The Most- Dashboard Confessional

Artist of the Week: Fujia and Miyagi - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N5XVeENmLMk

Lastly: I recorded via webcam me playing "Perfect Sonnet" and here's a link to that for all who

love links HOLLA!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Usg7YOGVEq4

Please Keep Breathing

Exit Music (for a film) is the one song that makes me feel okay. I can relax and breath a little when I hear it. "please, keep breathing" it says it right there and just hearing Thom Yorke sing it convinces me that if i just keep breathing, and don't lose my nerve, it will be okay. I can hear this song and feel completely dead to all major emotions other than the sweet taste of yearning. I yearn for peace in my battling mind. Crying never got anyone anywhere (for example alice cries so much that it becomes a major issue) This song helps me to not lose it. I can hold myself together when i hear my inner coscience singing to me through Thom. Times like now are perfect for mild apathy, why dwell on my selfish hearts desires and wishes when nothing can be changed.
S.O.W- Exit Music (for a film)
A.O.W-The Carpenters

~Sing us a song, a song to keep us warm.

Encouraging Discouragement

The past few weeks have been...discouraging and encouraging at the same time. Say what? As the hours and days went by I started seeing myself slipping into a somewhat nocturnal state. I slept 12 hours every day, and the rest of the time I just went to class and did whatever else expected of me. Throughout this time I have figured out difficult things about myself that I choose not to believe. I also have never prayed and read as much of the bible, than I have these past few weeks. What have I been asking God? Help! Help me! Fix me and help me! Interestingly enough, He is helping me slowly. I just have to have the faith and patience to get through this...

Another thing that gives me so much encouragement, is the absolute beauty of nature right now. I love fall for this!

As I have said before, my playlist can show how I'm feeling; so I looked at my Top 25 played (which consists of mostly Radiohead) and I saw a new song that has never been a song I've payed attention to....

Song of the week: Fix You by Coldplay http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JI-o25K6B-E

Artist of the Week: Sondre Lerche http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=618-UYb-8bg

Oh! My Selfish Heart Divides Me...

This past Sunday I went to the Barlow Girl, Superchick concert in Valporaiso, Indiana. It was quite fantastic to say the least. I surprised my little sister and we spent the day together in bliss, and then we drove out to Valpo for the concert, little did we know that there was a time change and we ended up getting there about two hours early... As I pulled up to the church I saw a huge SUV that has WFRN plastered all over it, driving this huge gas hog was my coach:Honey Storlie. I went up to her and said hi, and since Caitlin (little sister) and I were so early we decided to give Coach a hand. Then, she surprised us with VIP passes into the concert! We were able to meet both bands of Barlow Girl and Superchick, it was fantastic. And what's even more fantastic is that Becca Barlow (the lead guitar, and backup vocals) said, "Wow, I really like your hair, that purple looks so cool!" Yes people, a Barlow Girl commented on my awesome hair haha. Anyway, we got a great picture with them and I wished them all good luck. The concert was fantastic, (i could do without the chairs, it made it profoundly difficult to dance and jump) I got to here one of my favorite songs by Superchick (Beauty From Pain) and was scolded for recording the song. Then during the intermission, my coach asked my sister and I to come help her throw free t-shirts and stuff to the crowd, happily I obliged. Backstage, I got to see some awesome things, like Superchick performing from the curtain view, and also Barlow Girl praying in a neat little circle for their performance off stage. We also got to pray with one of the intro. bands (Vota) lead singer. Then I went on stage and yelled "FREE STUFF" and the crowd rose to their feet, hands in the air ready to catch whatever I threw. Then Barlow Girl performed and it was an amazing show, they played one of their old songs that I love "Never Alone" which I actually learned how to play on guitar a few years ago. And my favorite song of the night was "Beautiful Ending" because it is a particularly gorgeous song played by these unique girls. The lyrics are very meaningful, and encouraging making it a powerfully, deep song. The night was fantastic, and God was truly present throughout the entire time making the sister date a perfect one!

Music Artist of the week: (DUH) Barlow Girl. Check them out, they are three sisters from Elign, Illinois, and each and every one of them is incredibly talented. Alyssa Barlow even played bass, piano, and sang at the same time during the songs. And Lauren Barlow plays the drums while singing too, which can be quite difficult. These girls are incredibly encouraging and positive and are also partnered with Mercy Ministries which helps girls with any kind of issue really (eating disorders, self injury, pregnancy, etc.) They are a great band with a great cause.

Song of the Week: "Beautiful Ending"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixj6A_ZIuiI

Lyrics:

Oh, tragedy
Has taken so many
Love lost cause they all
Forgot who You were
And it scares me to think
That I would choose
My life over You
My selfish heart
Divides me from You
It tears us apart

So tell me
What is our ending?
Will it be beautiful
So beautiful?

Oh, why do I
Let myself let go
Of hands that painted the stars
And hold tears that fall?
And the pride of my heart
Makes me forget
It's not me but You
Who makes the heart beat
I'm lost without You
And dying from me

28:06:42:12

That's right folks, it is Donnie Darko Month! For those of you who haven't seen Donnie Darko, get up right now and go to Blockbuster, get the movie (and maybe, possibly some Apple Cider) and watch it, as soon as possible!!! The movie has an essential theme of overcoming your fear of death and also of loneliness. Donnie mentions that 'everyone dies alone' So loneliness and death could even go hand in hand. I've always thought that I would never be afraid of death because there is nothing to fear, once your dead you can finally be with God...but when I was faced with death I realized that I do fear death. I fear the unknown, even if the unknown will be with God. So as you embrace the glorious month of Donnie Darko, also remember all of the different obstacles that you can overcome with a little bit of motivation, a few friends, and of course the Almighty One.

With much thought and appreciation for music, I am proud to announce the Music Artist of the Week:

Muse

Muse just came out with a new album 'The Resistance' which has a lot of political references in it and a great quote for this blog.

"If you could flick a switch and open your third eye, You'd see that We should never be afraid to die"-from the song "Uprising" which was also featured on the political radio station NPR.

Start Over

A house of cards, the simple heart is not a place to dwell now you have a cake don't hesitate

c'mon just do it, c'mon just do it. Put it in your mouth there is only now. Tomorrow has to wait,

but no theres no backing out this is gonna be reality you can never dream it down.

I have no way of telling the two apart.

Well I made amends in the general sense the devils in the details.

and I know the cause and I wanna stop but I can't do it i just can't do it. There was love I meant there were accidents so tell me which is which cause I just can't work it out, but for memory and clarity i better write it down. I have no way of knowing the truth of time dissolved.

I put the past into the ground, I saw the future as a cloud, if theres no time to turn around but I'm going to. Its just one day i fell asleep and now a day i'm not a dream.

I am the first one i decieve if i make myself believe,

the rest is easy.

-Sometimes I express myself best from lyrics of other songs. This song is currently on repeat on itunes which tells me something about myself. There's something that I am going to change and I'm using this song to help me do it.

Open Your Heart...

In all of this world there is only one person who is ultimately faithful,

reliable and dependable. Someone that we can entirely put our trust into.

That reliable, trustworthy being is God. I have been going through everyday

trying to find something to make me happy,

make me fond,

make me proud,

make me complete.

But these substitutes of ultimate love are unstable. They eventually grow distant.

They will eventually return to the ground from which they were made.

That is why I am putting my all and everything into God. He is the one who will

always be there, He is with me even now. Every second of the day He is by my side, watching me,

guiding me, and encouraging me to continue this life.

"But happy are those who have the God of Israel as their helper, whose hope is in the Lord their God. He is the one who made heaven and earth, the sea and everything in them. He is the one who keeps ever promise forever..." Psalm 146:5-6

Also the musical artist of the week is SANTOGOLD! (ay ay ay ayy)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SIRpKa5ZMA

Art provided by: Carlton Vanskiver (my man)